Working on Your New Year's Resolutions?
I've been there too: wanting desperately to change. Not certain I could, but hoping I would anyway.
Wondering if it was possible, or if all of the messaging and articles and products were simply designed to play on my insecurities.
Aching for relief from questioning why I couldn't just buckle down for 30, 60, or 90 days and do what all of those ads promised.
I'm sure you have too, in one area or another, whether that's diet, exercise, relationship struggles, family boundaries, spending, personal development projects, or any other habit you've tried to introduce.
And there's the rub: we can't overhaul our habits in 30 days. We can't turn into brand-new people in one month.
We live in a culture obsessed with quick solutions.
Studies show that by January 8th, as many as 25% of people have already abandoned their resolutions.
Maybe, this year, we should try something different.
Old habits die hard. And many of us get inspired by the mood of New Year's Resolutions, think we can change it all in January, find we can't, get discouraged, and quit.
We believe in the black-and-white thinking, especially at this time of year. Which is fine (really). I believe that the all-or-nothing approach is a rite of passage, of sorts, to life. We have to white-knuckle our way through a few things (and usually fail) in order to understand that we'd be better served by working with ourselves rather than against our deepest instincts and desires.
Instead of damning ourselves for liking pizza or hating running or being afraid to address what's making us unhappy in our relationship, what if, starting right now, we examined this person with curiosity, rather than judgment?
What if we gave the person inside permission to be?
What if we figured out how to work with her, rather than stifle her and tell her that her time of hedonism and tactlessness is not now, so she must stay in the cage until we've hit our goals?
Health, fitness, and personal development exist to improve our quality of life — to make everything else better — not to take up all the space our lives have to offer.